My Dear Valentine
Happy Valentine's Day to the person who stole my precious heart.
I would like to give roses but instead I'll send my farts.
Earlier this morning while taking my daily shit, I pondered thoughts of you.
And I wondered, ...if you could smell what I'm smelling what would you say or do?
Our relationship is so crazy and we knew this from the start.
And why did I fall for you? 'Cause you already had stolen my heart.
So before this day is over let us share one last memorable drink.
Although, it is because of this "special coffee" that I threw up in the sink.
So one last toast to my loving Valentine who stole my loving heart!
And a toast to the roses that I would have given to him but instead I sent him farts!





